99 Problems

After a dreamy (yes, I said dreamy) past couple of days I came home to unbelievable job disappointment.  Surprise, surprise.  But I’ll get to that.  First I want to swoon over my mini vacation!

This past weekend was fantastic – like they always have been for the past few months.  But then after work on Monday I met up with He-Man (from the raving responses that I got from the original He-Man post, I just have to throw it in again every once in awhile :P) and we drove to his cottage to spend the next day and a half at together.  My mini vacay/the beginning of his week’s vacation was filled with delicious home-cooked food, a bonfire with marshmallows that were so big I basically need a plate and utensils to eat them, many many boardgames (some good, some unbelievably frustrating), four-wheeling in the rain, multiple laughs and root beer/orange crush floats!! (cross that one off the summer bucket list!) Oh, and the company I spent all that time with wasn’t so bad either. 

Have I mentioned that I’m now officially a “girlfriend” now?  ‘Cause I am.  And I’m ecstatic over it.  Oh, and have I mentioned that falling asleep with a smile on my face at night, and waking up to my boyfriend’s smiling face in the morning is basically the best thing in the world?  ‘Cause if not I’m letting you know now. 

So waking up to my church bell alarm early this morning and heading back home together so that I could make it to work on time wasn’t that big of a deal.  I was happy regardless and although work was an inconvenience, it’s gotta be done right?  But what was the big kick-in-the-shins when I got there?  Well, after two hours into my shift my boss said “so we’re running short on funds at the moment… do you mind if we cut your paycheck and I’ll reimburse you on one of the next ones?”

What. The. F***.  Are you kidding me?!? I’m barely making payments and saving money in my bank account on my pathetic paycheck as it is, and now you want to make it smaller?  Unbe-freakin’-lievable. 

Now, for those of you who don’t fully understand my dire financial situation, let me give you a little example of what this means for me.  I get paid every two weeks, and this Friday I will receive my biweekly paycheck.  When I cash this check, I will then have to write a check for my horse’s board payment.  At the end of this transaction I will walk away with $110 left over to keep me going for the next two weeks. 

Yep.  You read that right.  Oh, and let’s not forget that $120 check to the government I just mailed on Monday to cover my car’s provincial taxes, nor the fact that I still have to make my June’s car payment (which clearly is not going to happen…).   So excuse my French but, FUCK.

I was so angry and upset that I told my boss I didn’t feel well (which wasn’t too far-fetched actually) and I came home.  Was that immature?  Maybe.  Do I care?  Nope, ’cause I’m clearly not going to get paid for staying there for my full shift anyways.  Instead I parked my butt at my kitchen table with my laptop and spent the next hour and a half applying to every job I could find. 

The worst part of all this?  I also put my horse up for sale. 

Darby is my absolute light.  He is unbelievably special to me; he makes me laugh, he teaches me while I teach him, he makes me so happy, and I love him so much it hurts.  But I can’t afford him.  I bought him knowing that I wouldn’t keep him forever (he’s a 4 year old horse and I’m a 21 year old girl with big dreams, of course keeping him forever is not a likely scenario, but I didn’t think it would be this soon) but I just can’t stay in this financial crisis.  Yes, I hope to have a full-time job ASAP, but what about after that?  I will still have to finish off my car payment, my credit card payment (you can still go to hell for doing that to me), as well as a continuously large monthly payment for his board.  Someday I’d like to move out of my parent’s house, and no offense to the Town of Truro, but I don’t really want to stay here.  I made the mistake of trucking my previous horse along with me on my travels and now she’s left on the other side of the country.  There’s no way I will make that mistake with this one.

Now, I realize that the horse market here is shit and it’s unlikely that he’ll even sell in the relatively near future.  So who knows?  I might even get myself out of this hole before he’s gone and I’ll be able to keep him until life gets figured out.  But I can guarantee right now that he will only (and I literally mean only) be sold to someone that will give him the best home, love him to death, have the experience, understanding and knowledge to be able to work with a green horse, always have his best interest at heart, and of course allow me to come visit him. 

I’m talking like he’s actually going to sell.  He probably won’t and we’ll forget this ever happened.  I just absolutely hate that I even have to do this.  Eff you job market/economy/bank account/car/government.  How does it make you feel that you’re potentially taking a little girl’s pony?

So that was my rant and my attempt to fill you in on what’s going on.  Hopefully my next post will have good news about an awesome new job that I got that pays me so much money!

A girl can dream can’t she?

♥ DanielleCrowe

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